Dismal and disappointing. Two words for England.

Stubborn

I went into last night’s game between England and Algeria feeling pretty confident and a little bit smug. Spain lost their first game, France were almost out of the tournament and Germany had lost their second game. Maybe Germany would have had more success with a little bit of kick and rush football, eh Mr Beckenbauer?

All of a sudden, the doom and gloom that had surrounded England’s performance in the 1-1 draw against the USA was a distant memory and the feeling that we had no right to be considered in the same league as Spain and Germany seemed to be somewhat foolish.

So, with renewed hope of winning the World Cup we eagerly awaited the team news. Almost as eagerly as the players do by all accounts! Would Robert Green keep his place? Would Jamie Carragher maintain his place alongside John Terry? Would Emile Heskey stay in the side? Would Steve Gerrard be moved to a wide left position?

Experienced

I hoped that the experienced if not infallible David James would get the nod in goal, someone quicker than Carragher would play alongside John Terry, Wayne Rooney would play on his own up front as he wants to, with Steve Gerrard in a free role off him as he wants to, and Joe Cole on the left as he wants to. Whatever happened, we must not stick to the rigid 4-4-2 formation with a target man that is so predictable to play against.

When the team was announced I got just one of my wishes. Jamo was in goal but Carragher was at the back, Gerrard was on the left, Heskey was up front with Rooney and I can only assume that Joe Cole has had a relationship with Capello’s wife or daughter because there can be no other explanation as to why he hasn’t yet appeared on a team sheet.

Anxiety

Despite a feeling of anxiety coming over me as I began to worry that this team might not even be good enough to beat Algeria, I feigned confidence and hoped and prayed that we would get the all important win.

The first twenty minutes were among the most depressing minutes of football I have ever watched. My England were out played, out thought and out fought by Algeria. After that dismal start for a few minutes England actually put some passes together and looked a little dangerous when Steve Gerrard and Wayne Rooney linked up. (There’s a bit of a clue for you there Fabio!)

Long ball

It was short lived and England reverted to the tactic of trying to hit Heskey with a long ball and trying to play off that. Heskey did OK again but he is playing in a role that went out in the 1980s and has no place in a team that is apparently trying to win a World Cup.

The game ended 0-0 and England were quite honestly lucky to get nil. I asked my wife and youngest son to each give me a word to include in this article. The two that they came up with that are printable are dismal and disappointing. I decided against saying absolute shit. Oh no, I’ve said it now.

Positives

I don’t want to be totally negative so I have decided to dedicate an entire paragraph to the positives that we can take from the game.

Anyway, that’s all the positives, now let’s look at the individual performances.

David James – 7/10 – Dodgy punch early on but had little else to do.

Glen Johnson – 4/10 – Defensively poor, non-existent in attack.

John Terry – 6/10 – Not his usual self. One really bad back pass.

Jamie Carragher – 5/10 – Slow, cumbersome, booked, suspended.

Ashley Cole – 8/10 – Best player by a mile. Looked totally fed up with every other player.

Aaron Lennon – 3/10 – Fast direct winger for Tottenham. Indecisive player who goes backwards whenever challenged for England.

Frank Lampard – 3/10 – His name was on the team-sheet so I can only assume he must have played.

Gareth Barry – 4/10 – England’s saviour. Do me a favour.

Steve Gerrard – 3/10 – England’s best attacking central midfield player who has shone in a role just of a lone front man. I know, let’s play him on the left wing.

Emile Heskey – 5/10 – Great at what he does but we don’t want him to do it.

Wayne Rooney – 2/10 – Physically or mentally Rooney is not fit. He doesn’t want to be there does he?

Subs:

Shaun Wright-Phillips – 3/10 – Tried a novel thing for an England winger and attempted to run down the wing. Got a free kick, but didn’t try it again. Replaced Lennon in a like for like swap when the formation was obviously not working. Not really his fault.

Jermain Defoe – 3/10 – I know, let’s stay 4-4-2 but replace our big man with a small man. Let’s bring on a man who has forty caps but has never been deemed good enough to play a whole ninety minutes.

Peter Crouch – 5/10 – Made one decent run down the right wing. Crouch, on the right wing. What is going on?

Joe Cole – Oh no, he didn’t get on.

Manager:

Fabio Capello – 1/10 – He is a great manager but he got it very, very wrong here. The team selection was poor and showed a stubborn streak. It was clear after ten minutes that we needed to change the shape and he didn’t do it in the entire ninety minutes.

Unbelievably after an average performance and a draw against the USA and a terrible performance and a draw against Algeria, England still have qualification in their own hands. A win over Slovenia and it is last sixteen here we come and anything can happen from there.

If we do qualify and go on I will be the first to forget just how bad we were against Algeria. The problem is that I just can’t see us beating anyone. It is all so very disappointing yet again.